List of Concept Division showtapes (Johnsonverse)

This is a list of showtapes that were part of the Chuck E. Cheese's and ShowBiz Pizza Place Concept Division process from 2015 to 2021.

Under Renovation
This tape played for approximately one week while the stages were being remodeled.

Puppet Segments

 * Jaret Reddick as Chuck E. Cheese
 * Duncan Brannan as Crusty the Cat
 * Annagrey Labasse as Helen Henny
 * Jeremy Blaido as Jasper T. Jowls
 * Earl Fisher as Pasqually P. Pieplate
 * Chris Hill as Mr. Munch
 * Aaron Fechter as Billy Bob and Looney Bird

Showtape Segments

 * John Widelock, Scott Wilson, and Duncan Brannan as Chuck E. Cheese
 * John Widelock, Scott Paulin, Bob West, Reggie Smith, and Jeremy Blaido as Jasper T. Jowls
 * Nancy Lenehan, Karisa McKinney, and Annagrey Labasse as Helen Henny
 * Scott Wilson, Duncan Brannan, and John Bowen as Mr. Munch
 * John Widelock, Joe Spano, Bob West, and Earl Fisher as Pasqually P. Pieplate
 * John Widelock as Crusty the Cat
 * Paula Mulcahy as Madame Oink
 * Karlissa Hager as Harmony Howlette
 * Buffy Sainte-Marie as The Warblettes

Plot
Chuck E. Cheese (who is still an animatronic on Right Stage in 3-Stage setups, while in Studio C and Circles of Light setups, he is on his own monitor) and the other band members (shown on a monitor on Left Stage for 3-Stages), commentate on various showtapes made over the years, dating back to the late 1970s, all on a larger monitor on Center Stage. The tape is split into six parts, and at the beginning and end of each part, Chuck E., who is in the know, drops several clues as to who would replace the band, and leaves the rest of his band and the audience to figure it out themselves. At the end, Billy Bob and Looney Bird appear to promote the location's replacement with a ShowBiz Pizza Place.

Since parties were still necessary during Concept Division conversions, a hidden birthday song is included in this tape; Munch's Make-Believe Band performs the "Birthday Extravaganza" from the Pizza Time Players days.

Clues

 * "A conceited, clueless wolf and wisecracking dummy" (Rolfe DeWolfe and Earl Schmerle)
 * "A slow-witted brown mongrel in an astronaut outfit" (Dook LaRue)
 * "A large, boisterous gorilla who is the band's frontman" (Fatz Geronimo)
 * "A sarcastic polar bear who loves to surf" (Beach Bear)
 * "A gossip-loving, cheerleading mouse clad in white and green" (Mitzi Mozzarella Jr.)
 * "A sweet-natured country bear from Tennessee" (Billy Bob)
 * "A technology-loving red bird who lives in an oil barrel" (Looney Bird)

List of showtapes played

 * PTT Demo Showtape w/Crusty (May 1977)
 * Madame Oink - Around the World (November 1980)
 * Harmony II - Harmony's Hoedown (February 1982)
 * Broadway Helen Henny (August 1983)
 * Tune Machine/Country (March 1988-April 1988)
 * CEC American Pride (January 1990-February 1990)
 * Concept Unification Premiere (1989-1992)
 * Future (March 1991-April 1991)
 * Working for a Living (September 1992-November 1992)
 * Let the Good Times Roll (January 1994-March 1994)
 * Dance Party (April 1999-July 1999)
 * September 2002 Show (September 2002-November 2002)
 * April 2005 Show (April 2005-June 2005)

Part 1
 * - Used prior to June 2017 ** - Used from June 2017 to 2021 
 * Jasper: Hey, what's going on?
 * Helen: What's with these monitors?
 * Pasqually: And why aren't we on-a stage?
 * Mr. Munch: Seriously, what's going on?! Chuck E., did someone throw pizza on the stage again? We really need better security!
 * Chuck E.: Not this time, Munch. Actually, some hotshot businessman named Mr. Johnson has told me everything. I don't know if you've heard, but pretty soon, this will no longer be a Chuck E. Cheese's.
 * (The entire band gasps in shock)
 * Helen: But what will happen to the place, Chuck E.?
 * Jasper: Why is this even happening?
 * Crusty: Now, I'm shocked just as you are right now, but I can say that we will still be seen in other locations, so we won't disappear entirely, but we will be replaced in this particular location.
 * Chuck E.: Yeah. I know the new faces who'll replace us, but Mr. Johnson has told me not to give more than a few clues as to who the individual members are. Listen closely, people, because this is going to be valuable. Okay, now one of the characters is a conceited, clueless wolf and wisecracking dummy. All right, that's clue number one. Again, a conceited, clueless wolf and wisecracking dummy. Take a guess, all right?
 * Pasqually: Hmm...that's a tricky one.
 * Mr. Munch: Oh, this is too hard! I don't wanna leave!
 * Chuck E.: I know, and frankly, I don't want to, either. But this is our last show here, so let's make this one count. All right? Now, our second clue is a technology-loving red bird who lives in an oil barrel. Again, a technology-loving red bird who lives in an oil barrel.
 * Jasper: That sounds like Pizzacam. Y'all remember him?
 * Helen: Yeah. It's a shame he became a libertarian and quit to protest Chuck E. becoming a, and I quote, "soulless corporate sellout".
 * Chuck E.: Well, we had to go public! It's the fate of all big companies! And he came back recently, so it doesn't matter. Now, we're going to reminisce about the good times we've had all these years. We'll start all the way back at the very beginning. Back when we were the Pizza Time Players, and it was just me, Pasqually, Jasper, and Crusty.
 * Jasper: I loved that guy and he's back now, but why did he disappear?
 * Crusty: Well, I was fired by Mr. Bushnell for becoming a Communist.
 * Helen: ...ouch.
 * Crusty: Don't worry. I happened to be the worst Communist in the world. I thought the Proletariat was the enemy, but I was the Proletariat myself.
 * Mr. Munch: I...don't think any of the kids in the audience are gonna understand what we're talking about.
 * Chuck E.: I know. But Mr. Johnson said we have to start appealing to adults more in addition to kids.
 * Jasper: There's another person I remember.
 * Chuck E.: Who?
 * Jasper: Well, she's a pig. I used to flirt with her.
 * Chuck E.: Let me guess, Madame Oink.
 * Jasper: Ding ding ding ding! Wonder where she is anyway?*
 * Helen: I hear she went back to France after a run-in with Miss Piggy. And it was NOT pretty.*
 * Chuck E.: Wherever she is, I'm sure she's doing just fine, Helen. Anyway, roll the footage!*
 * Jasper: Ding ding ding ding!**
 * Chuck E.: Oh, yeah. Well, we brought her back as a guest star, so there's a chance you'll see her when you enter other Chuck E. Cheese's restaurants. Now, let's roll the footage!**
 * (The larger monitor plays clips from PTT Demo Showtape and Madame Oink - Around the World.)
 * Chuck E.: Wow...I often forget how much of a jerk I was back then. Anyway, we'll be right back with more Pizza Time Theatre and Munch's Make Believe Band highlights!

Part 2
'' * - These lines were played if the location was in Florida. ''

 ** - Used prior to June 2016 

 *** - Used from January to June 2016 

 **** - Used from June 2016 to 2021 
 * Chuck E.: Alright, we're back. Now, I'm sure you've been hearing a lot of noise from behind the curtains, right?
 * Rest of the band: Right.
 * Chuck E.: Well, they're doing work back there right now. These old stages have needed refurbishment for a long time, and what better time than when this place is becoming something else?
 * Jasper: I still don't wanna go!
 * Mr. Munch: They can't just toss us aside like trash! I've still got a lot of songs left in me! A-a-and there's still so much pizza I haven't eaten! This is inhumane!
 * Helen: Munch, this is no time to panic!
 * Mr. Munch: This is a perfect time to panic! Chuck E. Cheese's is done! Finished! Kaput! We're headed for the place all forgotten musicians go!
 * Pasqually: A retirement home?
 * Mr. Munch: No, worse! Florida!
 * Jasper: No! Not Florida! I hear their climate is crazy and their drivers crazier!
 * Helen: Uh, we're in Florida.*
 * Jasper: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!*
 * Crusty: Everyone, please!
 * (The rest of the band goes silent)
 * Crusty: Like Chuck said, we're just being replaced here. There's still plenty of Chuck E. Cheese's locations around the country that aren't making the switch!
 * Mr. Munch: I know, Crusty, but...this particular location (insert joke pertaining to the location undergoing Concept Division)!
 * (As this line is said, Munch's monitor fades to a photo of that location while he says the line)
 * Chuck E.: Yeah, you got a point there. But Mr. Johnson is kind of...hard. Like, I tried persuading him not to go through with it.
 * Helen: How'd he respond?
 * Chuck E.: He threatened to set a girl named Rei on me.
 * Pasqually: You mean Rei Ayanami from-a Monster World? That's a fate worse than-a death!
 * (As Pasqually says this, his monitor fades to a photo of Rei laughing maniacally with Vincent Price's laughfrom the Thriller music video playing in the background.)
 * Chuck E.: You're telling me. Anyway, it's time for the next clue. The drummer is a slow-witted brown mongrel in an astronaut outfit. Again, a slow-witted brown mongrel in an astronaut outfit.
 * Jasper: A canine! Say, what's next on our look-back at the good old days?
 * Chuck E.: Someone I'm sure you're familiar with, Jasper.** It's Harmony Howlette!
 * Jasper: *howls in excitement*
 * Mr. Munch: Say, whatever happened to her?**
 * Pasqually: Last I heard, she was-a hosting the Denver Post Frontier Days rodeo!**
 * Chuck E.: You know, don't tell anyone I said anything, but I heard Harmony has been making a resurgence on the music scene lately.***
 * Crusty: And she's back too! Chances are, you will see her from time to time.****
 * (Segment ends and the bigger monitor plays part of the "Harmony's Hoedown" showtape.)

Part 3

 * Chuck E.: Now that we're beginning Part 3, guys, here's our third clue: the keyboardist is a large, boisterous gorilla who is the band's frontman.
 * Jasper: I think I might have an answer...
 * Pasqually: We can reveal it later-a. So, what's next-a on the list?
 * Chuck E.: Remember when Helen Henny was an old Broadway diva?
 * Helen: (shudders) That was awkward.
 * Chuck E.: My sentiments, exactly. Fun fact: Helen was our last guest star before Pizza Time Theatre went into bankruptcy. She survived almost by default since she happened to be at all the locations when the company went bankrupt. Anyway, here's a little treat. A montage of some of our songs from the 1980s. Roll tape!
 * (The bigger monitor plays clips from the Broadway Helen Henny, Tune Machine/Country, and CEC American Pride showtapes)

Part 4

 * Chuck E.: Part 4, guys. We're in Part 4, so we're about to head into the late 1980s and early 1990s. A time when I wore a dapper tuxedo and was just coming out of that off-color New Jersey rat phase.
 * Helen: I still remember that!
 * Jasper: So what's our next clue, Chuck?
 * Chuck E.: The guitarist is a sarcastic polar bear who loves to surf.
 * Mr. Munch: That sounds familiar.
 * Crusty: Let them figure it out, Munch. By now, I'm pretty sure some nostalgic adult in the audience knows who they are.
 * Jasper: Remember Concept Unification? Back when the same thing happened all these years ago, except that we were the replacements?
 * Helen: Oh, yeah! I was finally retooled into a younger character.
 * Pasqually: While I finally got to fulfill my childhood-a dream to be a drummer!
 * Mr. Munch: Say, does anyone remember the name of the band we replaced?
 * Pasqually: Uh...Fre--
 * Chuck E.: NO. We are NOT going to invoke the name of Freddy Fazbear on the premises.
 * Jasper: But you just did.
 * Chuck E.: That was an exception.
 * Jasper: But you just said Freddy Fazbear.
 * Chuck E.: I said DON'T say Freddy Fazbear!
 * Jasper: But how come you get to say it, but we can't?
 * Chuck E.: I--NEVER MIND! Ugh...anyway, ladies and gentlemen, we present to you, the Concept Unification Premiere from December 1989. I need a drink. A soft drink.
 * (The bigger monitor plays clips from the Concept Unification Premiere showtape)

Part 5

 * Chuck E.: We're in Part 5! One more left to go after this. Now we're entering the 1990s and 2000s.
 * Jasper: I still remember your "Cool Chuck"/"Avenger Chuck" persona. Don't get that second name, though. I mean, I never saw you hanging with Iron Man or Captain America. "Cool Chuck" was more fitting.
 * Chuck E.: Even I couldn't understand that. I still remember when I had that... outfit. (Chuck E. shudders) I get it, they wanted me to be (making air-quotes) "hip and cool" (Chuck E. lowers his hands). That's fine... or at least it was, back in '97. But for some reason, they kept me like this for fifteen years, up to the early 2010s.
 * Mr. Munch: I kinda liked you as you were. I wonder why you changed?
 * Chuck E.: Because I looked like a relic of the '90s. The worst part of the '90s, specifically. Lots of people didn't like my new look at first, but I think nostalgia had something to do with it. Unlike pogs. Nobody I know misses pogs. Anyway, here's another clue: one of the vocalists is a gossip-loving, cheerleading mouse clad in white and green.
 * Helen: I was a cheerleader in the 2000s. Still remember that.
 * Mr. Munch: And I was in the middle of that extremely long cold that made me sound different. Like a crooner.
 * Pasqually: So what's our next-a show?
 * Chuck E.: Well, it's closer to a selection of clips from the 1990s and 2000s. Here's all the good times we had then.
 * (The bigger monitor plays clips from the Let the Good Times Roll, Dance Party, September 2002 Show, and April 2005 Show showtapes)

Part 6

 * Chuck E.: Now we're heading into the final part. We have one last clue, people. Let's recap: one member is a conceited, clueless wolf and wisecracking dummy, there's a slow-witted brown mongrel in an astronaut outfit, A large, boisterous gorilla who is the band's frontman, a sarcastic polar bear who loves to surf, and a gossip-loving, cheerleading mouse clad in white and green. Got it? (the band nods)
 * Crusty: Now here's our last clue: they're also the main characters. Chuck?
 * Chuck E.: (gulps) a sweet-natured country bear from Tennessee and a technology-loving red bird who lives in an oil barrel.
 * Jasper: (gasps) I think I just got it. And I don't like it.
 * Pasqually: I just-a got it, too! Oh, I knew they'd return one day for-a vengeance!
 * Mr. Munch: We're dead! We are dead! All dead! All gonna die! Dead Men Be We! A cornucopia of pain and despair is coming our way to ensure our demise!
 * Helen: Jasper. Slap him.
 * (Jasper slaps Mr. Munch offscreen)
 * Mr. Munch: Ow!
 * Helen: Thank you.
 * Mr. Munch: I thought we ran them out of town?! Last I checked, they were holed up at their headquarters in Orlando, doing freelance work for whoever would pay!
 * Chuck E.: Yeah, well, Mr. Johnson wanted them back. That's right, folks, in a few days' time, this Chuck E. Cheese's location won't be a Chuck E. Cheese's, as you probably know already, but a ShowBiz Pizza Place. And it wouldn't be a ShowBiz Pizza Place without The Rock-afire Explosion! Or Ho-kago Tea Time in the Japanese states.
 * Mr. Munch: Ho-Whatty Tea Time?
 * Chuck E.: Ho-kago Tea Time.
 * (A promotional image of Yui, Ritsu, Mio, and Mugi appears on the center monitor.)
 * Helen: Huh.
 * Jasper: But, I don't get it! We've been performing longer than they have! Surely WE have more marquee value?
 * Pasqually: Yeah, and I'm-a ten times the comedian that wolf ever was-a!
 * Chuck E.: Look, it's not my decision. I know, my name and face are on the building, but the truth is, I don't actually own Chuck E. Cheese's. I'm just the mascot, not privy to any decisions made at the top. And wouldn't you know it, it's just about time for us to say goodbye.
 * (The band wails in despair, in the most overdramatic way)
 * Chuck E.: But don't worry, there's still plenty of Chuck E. Cheese's locations around the world. We're not going anywhere. In fact, a lot of cities around the country will soon have both a Chuck E. Cheese's AND a ShowBiz Pizza Place. Before we go, a certain someone has a special message for all of you.
 * (Billy Bob and Looney Bird appear on the center monitor)
 * Billy Bob: Howdy, folks! I'm Billy Bob! That's three B's, two L's, a Y, an I, and an O! It sure is great to be back here with all of ya! I won't lie, things were looking pretty dark for the Rock-afire Explosion, but through the storm, we stuck together, no matter how hard the world tried. And wouldn't ya know, our perseverance paid off! I'd sure like y'all to join us on *insert date of grand reopening here* when this location reopens as ShowBiz Pizza Place! I'll be there, and so will Looney Bird! Isn't that right, Looney Bird?
 * Looney Bird: Whuh? Sorry, Billy Bob, I'm trying to get onto the wi-fi. What's the password?
 * Mr. Munch: 12345.
 * Looney Bird: 12345?! (Mr. Munch nods) That's the stupidest password I've ever heard! That's the combination an idiot would put on his luggage!
 * Mr. Munch: Uhh...
 * Looney Bird: Tch, aliens. And people wonder why the Moonrockers never took off...
 * Billy Bob: Yeah, the years haven't been too kind to Looney Bird. Anyway, back to you, Chuck E.
 * Chuck E.: Thanks, Billy Bob. And just to show there's no hard feelings over what happened in the early 90s, we've issued an official apology to your boss, Mr. Fechter. Anyway, that's all from us, folks! Next time you come back, just make sure to enjoy our replacements, all right? But before we go, we'd like to say thank you to all of you for coming out, not just today, but all these years. Without you, there'd be no Chuck E. Cheese's.
 * Crusty: All right, guys, time to start packing.
 * (The curtain on Chuck E.'s stage closes while the rest of the characters walk away as "See You Soon My Friend" from Future 91 closes out the show)

Hidden Birthday Song

 * Chuck E.: Alright, guys, parties are still going to be held while this location is being converted, so we have to sing our old birthday song from our Pizza Time Players days. Right here at this location, probably one last time.
 * Jasper: You mean...
 * (The music begins)
 * Chuck E.: Yeah. It's time for the "Chuck E. Cheese Birthday Extravaganza". Ready?
 * Helen: Sure am!
 * Pasqually: Of course-a!
 * Mr. Munch: I just love an old classic!
 * Jasper: I'd love to do it again!
 * Chuck E.: All right.
 * (The Parade of Cakes begins)
 * Pasqually: Here's that cake I baked!
 * (The Parade of Cakes continues, before the rest of the band hollers and the music ends)
 * Chuck E.: You know, the real stars of the show today are our very special birthday kids, and now comes the real magic.
 * Jasper: Card tricks? (A card sound plays)
 * Munch: Sawing a cake in half? (A sawing sound plays)
 * Pasqually: Pulling a rabbit out of your hat? (A slide whistle sound plays)
 * Chuck E.: Nope. Now our birthday guest thinks of a magic wish to make before they blow out the candles at the end of this song.
 * (The band sings "Happy Birthday To You")
 * Entire band: Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday from all of us! Happy birthday to you
 * (The music stops)
 * Chuck E.: Okay, make your wish, and...
 * Entire band: ...blow out your candles!
 * (A loud wind noise is heard)
 * Pasqually: Oh...
 * Munch: Hey!
 * Helen: It's getting breezy in here!
 * Chuck E.: Hold on to your hats!
 * Jasper: I am! I am!
 * (The wind noise stops)
 * Pasqually: You did it! You blew out your candles!
 * (The band cheers in joy and performs the song "Birthday Extravaganza", which is re-recorded with the current voice actors)
 * Entire band: We just want to say, happy birthday to you It's another great year for you to look forward to We just want to say, happy birthday to you Chuck E.: Happy birthday to you! Jasper: It's the truth no matter how hard you try Munch and Helen: You just can't stop those years from passing on by Pasqually: Make the most of each day with each-a new friend you meet Helen: Have a great birthday Entire band: One you can't beat! Chuck E.: And thanks for spending it with us. Entire band: We just want to say, happy birthday to you So much stuff that you've done So much more stuff to do Chuck E.: We just want to say, Entire band: Happy birthday to you! From Chuck E. Cheese's Where a kid can be a kid!
 * (A brief applause sound is heard)
 * Chuck E.: Now remember, our special birthday helpers are here to help you have a good time!
 * Jasper: They can help you tidy up your table...
 * Helen: Or carry presents to your car...
 * Munch: Or bring me a piece of your cake.
 * Other band members: Munch!
 * Munch: Heh heh heh. Sorry.
 * Chuck E.: So have the best time ever, and from all of us, a great big "thank you" for coming here today, and sharing your birthday fun with us.
 * Entire band: Happy birthday!

Trivia

 * This showtape was inspired by "The Rolfe & Earle (sic) Show", which played at ShowBiz Pizza Place locations that were undergoing Concept Unification between 1990 and 1992 in place of the Rock-afire Explosion; it was also the last Rock-afire Explosion showtape made for ShowBiz until 2015 and is widely considered the worst Rock-afire showtape ever made for its use of poor vocal impersonators for Rolfe and Earl, mixing up their characterizations, and their overall cheaper feel compared to Creative Engineering's shows.
 * The use of the "Birthday Spectacular" for parties is a nod to the Pizza Time Players era. It has been brought back on a regular basis since 2015.
 * The clips from the PTT Demo Showtape were filmed at the ShowBiz Pizza Time headquarters in Irving, Texas using restored Portrait Show animatronics that were kept in storage, while the Madame Oink - Around the World, Harmony II - Harmony's Hoedown, and Broadway Helen Henny showtapes were all filmed using animatronics loaned from Smitty's Super Service Station in Sandy Hook, Mississippi and Marvin's Marvelous Mechanical Museum in Farmington Hills, Michigan, on replica Balcony Stages. The clips from the Concept Unification Premiere were from the demo of the first segment released in 1989 at the end of the Christmas showtape for The Rock-afire Explosion, while the remaining clips came directly from those shows' Cyberstar segments.
 * The members of Munch's Make-Believe Band (except for Chuck E.) were depicted as puppets, while Billy Bob and Looney Bird were animatronics, shot at Creative Engineering headquarters in Orlando, Florida. Chuck E. is depicted as an animatronic; if no animatronic was used, as in Studio C and Circles of Light conversions, he was instead depicted on his own monitor as well, and was also portrayed as a puppet. This tape wasn't played if the location remains a Chuck E. Cheese's; instead, all showtapes were played on a large Cyberstar monitor.
 * The wi-fi password (12345) and Looney Bird's response are a reference to the 1987 science-fiction spoof Spaceballs.
 * Munch's freakout is a line-for-line reference to the ninteenth episode of Dragon Ball Z Abridged.
 * The third and fifth parts' showtape segments were a combined hour long. This was to allow for work to occur on Center Stage and Stage Left unimpeded, as the darkness provided by the reinstallation of the showroom wall and new lighting procedures was the perfect cover for moving props and animatronics to and from behind the curtains.
 * Part 5 was originally going to feature the "Awesome Adventure Machine" showtape from August-September 1996, but was replaced by the "Dance Party" showtape from April-July 1999 due the former having been made specifically for the Awesome Adventure Machine test stage, and thus all of the Cyberstar segments were unusable.
 * As an aside, the talking segment during the "Dance Party" showtape was filmed using the 2-Stage at the San Jose "Kooser Road" store, the second Chuck E. Cheese's to have ever opened and therefore the oldest in existence; it was shot just prior to the location being closed for remodeling. This was because the version used was the Existing Stages version, and while the characters were talking, a generic "Dance Party" splash screen was displayed on the Cyberstar monitors.

Cast

 * Aaron Fechter as Billy Bob, Looney Bird, Rolfe DeWolfe, Earl Schmerle, and himself
 * Burt Wilson as Fatz Geronimo, Sun, Moon, Click, Klunk's Mother, Announcer, and Callers
 * Rick Bailey as Beach Bear
 * Duke Chauppetta as Dook LaRue
 * Jeff Howell as Uncle Klunk
 * Sarah Locke as Mitzi Mozzarella Jr.
 * Shalisa Sloan James as Mitzi Mozzarella Sr.

Segment 1

 * (Aaron Fechter appears on the Cyberstar monitors)
 * Aaron Fechter: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, after years in exile, the greatest animatronic band to have ever graced the stage has finally returned to its rightful home here at ShowBiz Pizza Place! That's right, the world's most-advanced entertainment has rejoined forces with the world's finest pizza!
 * (The Rock-afire Explosion sings "Welcome In" from the ShowBiz Pizza '82 showtape)
 * Billy Bob: Alright! We still got it! Howdy, folks! I'm Billy Bob! That's three B's, two L's, a Y, an I, and an O! I can now safely say that the Rock-afire Explosion is back!
 * (The band hoots and hollers in joy)
 * Billy Bob: Ever since we were callously kicked to the curb by the old corporate suits, we've been trying to find any work we could, any at all. We tried to continue our gigs in a few other restaurants, but those didn't make a big enough impact, regrettably, with the exception of Looney Bird's chain, and even then, hardly did any new material. Things were looking bleak, but like we said during Christmastime in '86, we stuck it out through stormy weather, and will always stay together. And look at us! We're all still here! Well, almost. Mitzi thinks she's too old to be a role model for girls. But that's okay, 'cause we got her daughter, Mitzi Jr.!
 * Mitzi Jr.: I may only be (insert age here), but my mama says I've got the voice of angels!
 * Fatz: Ah, that ya do, Junior! Why, I heard ya backstage before the show practicin', and, and ya got ya mom's magic!
 * (The band murmurs in agreement)
 * Billy Bob: So, anyway, what's everyone been up to since we went our separate ways for a spell back around '99?
 * Fatz: Well, I've been moonlightin' as a lounge singer at the Contemporary Resort at Walt Disney World.
 * Beach Bear: Ooh, nice!
 * Dook: Makin' me jealous, Fatz!
 * Fatz: The pay's good, I get to stay in a nice room in the main tower, and I wake up every morning watchin' the monorails whizz by and looking at Cinderella's Castle and Space Mountain.
 * Mitzi Jr.: It's like a dream come true!
 * Fatz: That it is, Junior, that it is!
 * Billy Bob: How's Esmeralda?
 * Fatz: Been waitin' years for her.
 * Dook: Well, after we went our separate ways, I went into writing sci-fi novels. Didn't get off the ground. Then I tried making movies. Again, didn't work.
 * Looney Bird: I have a copy of that! It's called Pizza Wars. Dook used a lot of money he made from royalties to make that.
 * Dook: The film was my pride and joy until the executives took it away and hired a new director to reshoot most of it. And still kept my name on it.
 * Beach Bear: I tried a fashion line of Hawaiian shirts and shorts. Didn't work out as well as I'd imagined.
 * Mitzi Jr.: My mother went on to become a model.
 * Rolfe: And my fame only skyrocketed even more! Millions of people worship me and would love to kiss the ground that I walk on.
 * Earl: Who said you received fame? Last thing you did of any importance aside from freelance work was that terrible show the suits forced imitators to do in the early 1990s! They made me the clueless idiot you are, and you the witty one, they didn't even sound like us, and they added an "E" to the end of my name!
 * Rolfe: Shucks, Earl, that's the nicest thing you've said to me since we came back.
 * Earl: That's nice for you, considering HOW MUCH OF A GEEK YOU ARE!
 * Rolfe: Shut up, Earl, or else I'm disassembling you.
 * Billy Bob: Anyway, here's "Daydream Believer" by The Monkees! One, two, three...
 * (The band sings "Daydream Believer" by The Monkees)
 * Rolfe: This is Rolfe DeWolfe coming to you live from ShowBiz Pizza Place! Isn't it great to be able to say that again, Earl?
 * Earl: Not when it's you saying it!
 * Rolfe: Yeah, Earl has gotten cranky as the years passed.
 * Billy Bob: Anyway, we're not the only ones returning, because back in '82, we had a special guest in certain restaurants. He was quite funny until the corporate suits butchered him. But he's back and better than ever, I assure you. He's up there in this monitor. So ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the band... the Uncle Klunk Abomination!
 * (Uncle Klunk appears on the Cyberstar monitors, and his theme song plays)
 * Klunk: Welcome folks to the Uncle Klunk Abomination We're really gonna have a good time for this sensation Well, the name is Uncle Klunk And you're really gonna have a good time And it don't even matter if you put too many words in a line just as long as it rhymes Well, here he is, just for you The Uncle Klunk Abomination With the weather, with the sports
 * Klunk and backup singers: And other stuff
 * Klunk: So you're stormin' for a real big treat The kind that entertainment that can't be beat So sit right back and drop your feet Cookin' pizza, to commence To get ready, to get started
 * Click: Ca-ca-commence and get ready to get started?
 * Klunk: No, fix the "commence and get ready to get started". With the Uncle Klunk Abomination
 * (Klunk's theme song ends)
 * Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Uncle Klunk!
 * Klunk: Hey everybody, this is Uncle Klunk, your voice of the pizza, and I am back. Oh, man. Today's first abomination is gonna be a real

Segment 5

 * Looney Bird: Billy Bob?
 * Billy Bob: Yes, Looney Bird?
 * Looney Bird: Remember when I had a chain of restaurants?
 * Billy Bob: Oh, yes! Looney Bird's.

Trivia

 * Aaron Fechter's introduction was filmed at Creative Engineering headquarters in Orlando, Florida on February 18, 2015, while the Creative Engineering building was being renovated. His appearance was shot in front of the building's Rock-afire Explosion show. For the grand opening of the San Jose, California location (the first location of the revived ShowBiz Pizza Place), Fechter appeared in-person.
 * This is the first showtape to feature Uncle Klunk since the "Country Klunk" showtape in 1985, as well as the first to use the Jeff Howell portrayal and characterization since the original 1983 showtape.